Carla went through stages with her voice, she was out there, then she shut down, and her voice changed. In her first live video, 'Carla's voice was squeaky. A mousy voice is perceived as weak; It doesn't sound genuine but fake and lacking in confidence. Carla used to belittle herself because she didn't want to overpower people with her voice or for people to perceive her as mean.
Your voice is a powerful tool; it's an instrument that can play weak or powerful. Attached to that is knowing who you are. Carla has a Women's Event that is coming up, and it is about finding your voice and what you want out of life. If you go to www.dothework/we3.com, you can get more information on this event that is coming up on September 27th and 28th in Arizona. Register and apply or follow Carla and her journey.
To have a solid voice, you need to know who you are, and that is how you find it. Janette, like all of us, have gone through hard times; it defines who you are when you have a strong, confident voice. When Janette first became the Broker for A.Z. & Associates, she was not confident when she was on camera, and she has grown leaps and bounds in that aspect.
The more reps she did and the more comfortable she became, she is now the Badass Broker. The agents at A.Z. & Associates are continually doing the work and putting in the reps to be as badass as they can be. When Carla asked one of the men at the agency, how they respond when a woman approaches them with a weak, mousy voice, how does he react? He admits that it's human nature to want to go in and take control and advantage of the conversation, especially if it's on sale.
When you show up weak and feel threatened, the automatic response is to raise your voice and become rude. Some people shut down when someone else is trying to voice their opinion or prove a point. It happens a lot because they don't want to argue or put up a fight; it's not worth it to them. It should be worth it though, because those are the repetitions you need to be putting in. By having awkward conversations and being put in uncomfortable situations, you will be training your voice to show up confidently.
“The more you get a backbone and put yourself out there, the stronger and more confident you will become. If you show up with a small voice and weak handshake, that is how people will see you. When you give that energy of weakness that is the energy you will get in return. ”- Carla
Confrontation is awesome because you learn so much about yourself. You need to speak up, but you also need to listen and not focus on only your response. By Janette returning a call to agents and clients that aren't happy and are confrontational she has put in the reps to use her voice to achieve success.
Ask someone you trust, if they didn't know you, how would your voice come across to them? Is it strong and confident or shaky and mousy? How do you sound on the phone? It's important to know who you are and what you are. Do a live video, and how do you sound when you watch it back?
When you are holding the camera and you are shaking, and you can't stand to hear yourself talk on camera; how else are you showing up in other areas? What are you showing to other people around you? Do live videos and put yourself out there. How do you sound? Are you genuine or fake? How you criticize others is how they criticize you; we criticize others in the way we view ourselves. If you're showing up weak, mousy, anxious, fearful, that is how your audience is seeing you.
If you want respect from others, give that energy to yourself first; show up strong. The more you get a backbone and put yourself out there, the stronger and more confident you will become. If you show up with the small voice and the weak handshake, that is how people will see you. You give that energy of weakness that is the energy you will get in return.
If you are afraid of confrontation, ask yourself why? You need to have those conversations and not avoid them. A lot of people avoid putting out the message they need to put out. Offering sweetness and being meek will not get you the results or respect you want or need to succeed. Be direct, ask people what they want, listen, and respond with confidence and assertiveness; this is how you will find your voice and discover who you are.
Know who you are, and if you are unsure or unhappy, find out why. What will it take to make you happy?
Subscribe, rate, and review this podcast on your favorite podcast provider or go to www.dothework.com to learn more about Carla or to apply to be a part of The WE3 Event coming up September 27th and 28th.